How To Find Mr Right (Or Miss Right!)
The single life is a great time in your life and really shouldn't be missed out on. I explain why in detail here. Times of slutting it bring moments of drama, gossip, bitching and new bedroom antics. But after some time, whether they all happen or not makes no odds. It can get a little boring, and a little lonely.
I've had both experiences. The side of freedom is amazing but I'd be lying if I said I didn't miss nights spent cuddling, eating loads of food and watching DVDs when I was single. It got to the stage that I felt like a failure if I didn't get to kiss someone on a night out. All of my time getting ready to head out all revolved around the possibility of kissing a stranger, and over time, shit like that fades, because I began to think "I don't care anymore."
There was only so much shifting and drifting I could do (kissing and fucking off basically!) and I realised the majority of my single days were spent being on the hunt. Scouring the town for male victims of prey along with my girlie companions doing the same. Just like a pack of wolves in heat! And my nights out all had the intent of getting with someone. I even submitted to online dating which was a disaster! You can read about it here.
I decided to stop going out with the intention of getting with a guy as late New Years Resolution of 2013. It lasted a bare two and a half months. Because then, out of nowhere, I met Darren, a guy who lives in my town, who has always been around but I never really knew him well or thought of him in that way, until BAM! Now I know him TOO well. :)
Thinking back, I wondered, what made that happen? And I can honestly say I think I found him because I stopped looking to be with someone. I started focusing on myself, enjoying myself and at the time I just said "Fuck it!" and began drinking a lot more with my Dad! Those were the best nights out and it was on the Thursday before Good Friday that the next two years would be fab dot com.
I can't speak for everyone, even though I try to! ;) But I do know that if you're constantly looking and trying to find something, sometimes the opposite happens. You get so focused that you miss opportunities right infront of you. If you're like me, you could even become so picky about potenial people that you spend more and more time alone. And being picky isn't a bad thing because you want to make sure you get with someone who deserves you. But that can easily get mixed up with becoming judgemental and superficial, even just basing people according to their looks which is completely wrong for any relationship, and very immature.
Finding Mr or Miss Right is so easy. The steps are like this:
Stop looking for them.
Enjoy yourself at every opportunity.
Don't dedicate all of your time to finding someone.
Avoid becoming desperate/judgemental when picking someone.
And most importantly:
Learn who you are and love yourself for it.
The last one is the most important one because, realistically, if you don't know who you are as a person and don't love all of your flaws and qualities, how do you expect someone else to?
Mr and Miss Right will come along when you least expect it. I heard this advice when I was feeling low and missing cuddles and thought it was complete bullshit. Until it happened to me two and a half months after I began to take that advice seriously.
And so should you.
Learning to love who you are will bring many, many great moments to your life, and when the time is right, will also bring in the right person for you.
Be patient and know you're worth it. "Maybe she's Maybelline!"
I want invites to all weddings! ;)
Until next time! <3